The Tale of Two Christmases

Is there ever another time of year where the same event or season can bring about such polarized emotions? From the day after Thanksgiving through December 26th for our family (this is the date of our last official Christmas celebration of the year) I run the gamit of emotions from excited to frustrated to exhausted to elated and etc. etc. etc. Sometimes my emotions switch from one extreme to the other in a matter of seconds. Yesterday was an example of this. Last Tuesday night Jason had his office Christmas party, and in the kids' gift exchange, Elizabeth was the recipient of an e-pet. For those who don't know, an e-pet is a small stuffed dog that comes with a registration code for a special website that allows the pet owner to visit a virtual world for his/her dog and earn points/money to visit a diner, spa, and various other locations (according to Elizabeth, an amusement park is in the works.) The e-pet was quite a hit with Elizabeth and with Anna who was pretty upset that she also didn't get an e-pet in the exchange (although she was perfectly happy with her Backyardigans memory game at the party.) When Elizabeth was at school last week, Anna would get on Elizabeth's e-pet account and play, usually spending more money than she would earn. She complained to her grandmother that she didn't understand why 8 year olds were old enough for an e-pet but 4 year olds weren't. The e-pet website said that e-pets are sold at Target, Meijer, Toys R Us, Wal-Mart, and K-Mart, so yesterday, when I headed to Wal-Mart for some groceries, I decided I would get Anna her own e-pet.

Anyone braving Wal-Mart yesterday deserved a gold star. The grocery side wasn't bad, but the other side, especially the toy aisles, were nearly impassible, especially with a cart. I headed to the stuffed animal section and looked for the e-pets. I didn't see any. I manuevered my way through the handheld games and board game aisles but still had no luck. "Maybe they are back in electronics," I thought, so I headed to the back of the store. The only section more crowded than the toy section at Wal-Mart was the electronics. I stood in line for 5-10 minutes at the electronics check out just to ask the cashier if there were any e-pets in this section. She said no, if Wal-Mart carried them, they would be in the toy aisles. I headed back to the toy aisles, flagged down an associate who told me that they weren't going to carry any more e-pets until after the first of the year. Feeling very defeated, I drove my cart to the checkout and proceeded to wait close to a half hour to check out, minus an e-pet.

The website had mentioned K-Mart as another place to get e-pets, so I called Jason to call K-Mart to see if they had any e-pets. I was already in South Marion, so Gas City didn't seem too far away. He said he would call, and I started over to Gas City. I was half way to Gas City when he called back. He said they didn't have e-pets at K-Mart, but they did have Webkinz, which apparently is similar to e-pets. I have heard of Webkinz, but since Anna was already familiar with the e-pets site and really wanting an e-pet, that is what I wanted to get. I figured since I was almost to K-Mart, anyway, I would check it out and probably end up purchasing a Webkinz. Feelings of disappointment were welling up inside of me. I knew how much Anna wanted an e-pet. I thought it would be so easy to get one for her, and yet after spending all that time at Wal-Mart fighting through the crowds and sweating profusely in my heavy coat (what was going on with the weather yesterday, anyways? 50 degrees?) and still not having this e-pet, I was very frustrated.

I headed into K-Mart and went straight to the toy section. I found the stuffed animals, and lo and behold, right there in plain sight, for $11.99, WERE THE E-PETS!!! I didn't know whether to laugh, cry, or break into the Hallelujah chorus right there on the spot. After all the searching and frustration and disappointent, feeling of elation rushed over me - all over a little stuffed animal. But it was a little stuffed animal that I knew would make my 4 year old so happy.

I paid for it, rushed to the car, called Jason and told him of my good find, went home, wrapped that little cocker spaniel up, called Anna downstairs and gave her an early Christmas present. I will have to admit I had a very selfish reason for giving it to her early. Jason and Elizabeth went to the Colts game today, and I had lots of chores to catch up on and gifts to wrap, so I knew the e-pet would occupy her so I could get some things done. The look on her face and her jumping up and down and into my arms was definitely worth all of the effort.

The above story is just one example of the different emotions that the Christmas season brings. Below are some other emotions I have experienced.

The pressure of finding the perfect gift for someone
The joy of watching someone open up the perfect present from me
Exhaustion after a day at the mall carrying around so many packages that I thought my hand was going to have a permanent indentation in it from the bag handles.
Peace sitting in my living room with all of the light off except for the Christmas tree and candles in the windows.
Stress trying to make it to Christmas programs, parties, and family get togethers
Enjoyment sitting and relaxing and talking with relatives that we only see a couple of times a year
Comfort hanging out at home with Jason and the kids, all of us in pajamas watching A Very Brady Christmas (we don't make it a point to watch this every year, but it seems like we always stumble upon it on the tv, and once we start watching we can't stop.)
Worry that I spent more money than we had budgeted
The feeling of familiarity as we carry out Christmas traditions - putting up the tree and our special ornaments, completing the advent calendars, etc.
Frustration when gifts ordered over the internet don't come in on time
Honor lighting the advent candle at church
Annoyance when two gifts I bought in the store cost $25 more than if I would have ordered on-line
Gratefulness that we are able to spend Christmas time with both my family and Jason's family each year
Awe - the whole Christmas story and the fact that Christ came to Earth in the manner that He did - wow!

And in a little more than 3 short days, the festivities will be over. The gifts will be put away, the decorations will come down, the bills will be paid, and yet, our Lord is still our Saviour, today, tomorrow, in July, and Black Friday 2008!

Is it Real?

Is it real? That is the question our four year old has been asking us often when she wakes up in the middle of the night and wanders into our room. The first night it happened, Jason, still half asleep and thinking she was talking about a dream she had just had, said, "No, it's not real." Wrong answer. Anna proceeded to ask hysterically, "It's not? It's not real?" to which Jason hastily replied, "Yes, yes it IS real," still having no idea what she was talking about. We just wanted her to calm down and go back to sleep. Two nights ago she asked the question again, and the next morning we finally got out of her that she is talking about the world, or more specifically, the experience she is experiencing at that exact moment she is asking the question. I guess that's why she was a little bothered when we were telling her that life was not real.

Now that we have cleared that little mystery up with Anna, her eight year old sister Elizabeth asked a different sort of "Is it real" question today on the way home from church. It was the question that I had been expecting and preparing an answer for, not knowing the exact time and place that it would be asked. She decided today was the day. "Mommy, I want to know if Santa Claus is real. And DON'T LIE TO ME!"

Let me back up a bit and give some added details to the story. Last year when wrapping up presents for the girls, we labeled all of Elizabeth's gifts to be from us except for one - the My Little Pony Magic Castle. This was the one present Elizabeth wanted and the one we said she couldn't have because it was too big and would take up too much space, and she would only play with it once or twice and then it would collect dust. So we decided that this special present would be the one from Santa. Elizabeth was excited when she opened up the present, but she was very perplexed that after being such a good girl all year, Santa only brought her one gift. It was one of those moments on Christmas morning where a little wind goes out of your sails as a parent because you have put time, energy, love, and yes money into this very special morning, and instead of hearing what a wonderful parent you are, you hear about what a cheapskate Santa is.

Determined not to let such a technicality put a damper on this Christmas, I asked Elizabeth before this shopping season began how many presents she thought Santa Claus brought really good girls. She said she thought really good girls would get 5 presents from Santa and 5 presents from their parents. I asked Anna the same question, and she said 1000 presents, so I went with Elizabeth's answer instead.

Since Elizabeth's Christmas list does not yet include expensive electronic items yet (I know my time is coming,) 10 presents seemed very doable for the budget, especially when a $2.50 set of earrings is still exciting. So gifts were bought, and last night I began to wrap. But I wanted to be strategic with the wrapping. She saw me wrapping other gifts with the wrapping paper I already had in the house, and she used some of it, too, to wrap her gifts. I was safe to use that wrapping paper on the gifts Jason and I got her, but it would take special wrapping paper to distinguish which gifts were from "Santa." Then comes the labeling of the gifts. I can't use our tags and my handwriting to say, "To Elizabeth, From Santa." So I thought I would go to Wal-Mart after church today, buy some special Santa wrapping paper, and then get a big "E" and "A" stamp to stamp all over the wrapping paper that covered the gifts from Santa (Good Housekeeping idea.)

After church Jason dropped me off at the door of Wal Mart and stayed in the car with the girls. I headed inside, got two rolls of wrapping paper, and headed toward the craft section for the stamps. The only letter stamps they had were in packs of all 26 letters and numbers 1-10 for $9.99. I'm all about playing Santa, but this Santa is too cheap to pay $9.99 for these stamps. I decided I could figure out another way to label the presents, so I checked out without the stamps and got in the car (being oh so careful to hide my newly purchased wrapping paper.) As I closed the door, Jason gave me a smile and said, "Elizabeth has a question, and I told her we would wait until you got back before we answered it." And thus, out came the question I had anticipated and mentioned above.

After sidestepping the question valiantly by asking what she thought and what her friends thought and why was she asking me this, I finally gave in and truthfully answered her questions. We talked about St. Nicholas many years ago and the tradition of gift giving and how Moms and Dads really give all of the gifts but it's still fun to pretend. Just to make sure she understood, she said, "So you are saying that when I grow up and become a mom, if I don't put presents under the tree, then there won't be any presents for my kids?" I guess she got it.

She seemed fine with the truth. In fact she asked if this year she could eat the cookies we set out. I don't know why I expected tears or disappointment - I can't remember when I learned "the truth," and I still remember playing along, even well into my teen years when my parents would still give me gifts from not only Santa but Rudolph and the elves as well.

And little Anna - well she was in the car during the whole conversation but I don't think she was even paying attention. We'll play along for her until she figures it out, too, and then we will probably still play along even after that. It's just fun. Both kids already know why we really celebrate Christmas, and I think they get (or will get in the future) that the whole gift giving thing is really just another expression of love.

And I am really glad now that I didn't buy those stamps.

Don't I Know You?

We've all experienced this awkward situation. Someone approaches you and starts talking to you as if you know who they are. You know they look familiar, you just can't put your finger on how you know them. I run into this situation a lot with families I have worked with through Head Start. We enroll 168 families a year, so after 11 years of that, it is hard for me to keep track of over 1600 faces, names, and family histories.

But what is even more awkward is when someone strikes up a conversation with me as if we know each other, but I still have no idea with whom I am talking to. This happened two times to me recently. The first time was when we went to Chuck E. Cheese a few Saturday nights ago. I was standing by the Whac-a-mole game, waiting on Anna to win her two tickets, when I felt someone tap me on the shoulder and say, "Hey, how are you doing?" I looked up expecting to see a familiar face, but I had no idea who this man was. He must have noticed the confused expression on my face, because he proceeded to say, "Frank, remember, from the cross country team?" I will have to admit that really didn't help me out at all, but I put on a fake big smile and said, "Oh yeah! Hey, how are you doing?" as if him telling me his name was Frank suddenly cleared up my confusion. At least he had given me the clue "cross country team," so I at least had a point of reference to talk about. I assumed he meant that he had been a part of the IWU cross country team, so I started up a conversation with him about some friends of mine who had also been on the cross country team. We caught each other up on mutual cross country team friends, told each other where we were working, that we were married, and how many kids we had, and then it was time to say goodbye. It was at this point when he said, "Yeah, I saw your IWU tennis team sweatshirt (yes, I still wear sweatshirts that are over 10 years old and say Porter on them) and I thought you were Morry's wife." Morry was a mutual friend who was on the cross country team, and his wife was also on the tennis team, and in Frank's defense, I am built like her and we both have short hair. So I guess the joke was on both of us - I'll bet after I turned around when he first approached me that he felt more awkward than I did at that point.

The second time I experienced a case of mistaken identity was at Papa Murphy's. First I want to say that I LOVE Papa Murphy's, especially when I have a $2.00 off any pizza coupon and can get an incredibly cheap pizza that lasts at least 3 meals. On this particular Papa Murphy's trip as I walked up to the register to order, the cashier said in a loud voice, "Hey, I haven't seen you since therapy." Many, many things ran through my mind at that point, not having a clue of who this person was and what kind of therapy she was talking about, but I wanted it to be known to the rest of the people in Papa Murphy's that I was not at one point GOING to therapy with this person. Again, I had a confused look on my face, so the cashier added, "The hospital, right? You do therapy at the hospital?" Well at least now I knew we were talking about PHYSICAL therapy, but I had to assure the woman that I had never worked for the hospital, that I don't do therapy, that I don't go to therapy, and we had probably never met before. I tried the standard, "I've worked with Head Start preschool for several years, did you have a preschooler in Head Start?" but that wasn't where she would have known me. Yes, another awkward moment, I paid for my pizza and left.

Just last week I was going from the main office at Tucker to my office when a familiar looking face stopped me and started talking about her son. Her face really looked familiar but her name and family situation just wasn't coming to me. However, I was able to play this one off good until finally through the course of the conversation I figured out who she was. Then I made sure I went overboard with facts about her family just in case she had suspected at first that I didn't know who she was. I don't want people to feel unimportant or slighted if I can't remember exactly who they are.

When we were in Florida over Fall Break, we stayed at a condo and went swimming often. While swimming one day, I saw a woman who looked exactly like a teacher I have seen at an elementary school here in town. I don't know this teacher at all, I have just seen her in the halls and have had maybe one conversation with her ever, so even if I was for sure it was her, I still would have felt awkward going over to her and asking her if she was who I thought she was. So instead I did the next best thing - I kept staring at her trying to figure it out. That was MUCH less awkward, especially when she kept seeing me stare at her. I saw that same teacher today at the school, and I still didn't have the guts to go up to her and ask her if she was in Florida over Fall Break.

And thus, the stories of the "Mistaken Identities."